Alex was told on many occasions that he’d never be adopted. Earlier this month, he defied the odds and was adopted by a family that already included his biological sister. You won’t leave this story with dry eyes, we can promise you that!
Here’s a note from his mother:
My son Alex was told he would never have a family.
Abigail and Alex were born brother and sister, but as foster children in Georgia, they were never supposed to be placed together. No one was believed a home together was a possibility.
For most of his life, Alex, who would suffer meltdowns and throw tremendous tantrums, was written off altogether.
Now Abigail, 14, and Alex, 11, are legally and permanently brother and sister once again. Alex has joined a large and complicated family. I adopted Chandler and Amber several years ago and Abigail four years ago. Then there is Gabriel, my husband Daniel’s elementary-school-aged son, and a high-school-aged foster sister.
After Alex’s adoption was finalized in Chesterfield Circuit Court on Dec. 4, he sat down and recalled his adoption journey.
“I was literally told I was never going to have a family, which, actually, usually led up to all my tantrums and stuff. All I knew about my sister was that I had one. For most of my life, I had to just hope that she was real – and not just in my imagination.
“When I found out that it was actually true that I did have a sister, I was very happy, just by that fact. But that, combined with the fact that I was also going to be living with her, and be adopted, and actually be with a family…. Let’s just say I was pretty overwhelmed.”
Lutheran Family Services of Virginia always shared my dream, which started as Abigail and Alex’s dream, of bringing these siblings back together.
When I expressed interest in adopting Abigail, their response was, “Of course! Let’s make it happen.”
When Alex came along, even with all he was going through and all of his needs, no one at Lutheran Family Services once said, “This can’t happen.”
Lutheran Family Services understands the lasting effects of trauma on foster children, and their training in therapeutic foster care was a huge help. When I called the crisis line, someone was there. When I just needed someone to walk me through a tough spot, someone was there to say, “Yes, you can do this. I know it’s hard, but we’re here.”
The people at Lutheran Family Services knew I wasn’t going anywhere. They knew I wasn’t giving up. But sometimes I just needed to hear that other people thought I was a good parent, because in the middle of it, you don’t always feel like a good parent. I’m grateful to them, and to people like you, for offering support when I needed it most.
Abigail spoke after Alex’s adoption, too.
“All those years that we weren’t together, I just never really felt happy, and it’s something I’d always prayed about for years. When I came into the home, with Mom, I told her that’s all I wanted. And then, he came home. And knowing that today, he’s adopted, it’s just amazing.”
She’s right. It’s just amazing.